The most annoying kind of comment ever (Warning: Contains swearing)
Friday, 18 December 2009This is a comment I just posted on io9 about other people’s comments, because sometimes I just GET SO IRRITATED:
Of all the varieties of irritating comment out there, the absolute most annoying has to be “Why can’t you just watch the movie for what it is??? Why can’t you just enjoy it? Why do you have to analyze it???”
If you have posted such a comment, or if you are about to post such a comment, here or anywhere else, let me just advise you: Shut up. Shut the fuck up. Shut your goddamn fucking mouth. SHUT. UP.
First of all, when we analyze art, when we look for deeper meaning in it, we are enjoying it for what it is. Because that is one of the things about art, be it highbrow, lowbrow, mainstream, or avant-garde: Some sort of thought went into its making — even if the thought was, “I’m going to do this as thoughtlessly as possible”! — and as a result, some sort of thought can be gotten from its reception. That is why, among other things, artists (including, for instance, James Cameron) really like to talk about their work.
Now, that doesn’t mean you have to think about a work of art. I don’t know anyone who thinks every work they encounter ought to only be enjoyed through conscious, active analysis — or if I do, they’re pretty annoying themselves. And I know many people who prefer not to think about much of what they consume, and with them I have no argument. I also have no argument with people who disagree with another person’s thoughts about a work of art. That should go without saying. Finally, this should also go without saying, but since it apparently doesn’t: Believe me, the person who is annoying you so much by thinking about the art? They have already considered your revolutionary “just enjoy it” strategy, because it is not actually revolutionary at all. It is the default state for most of humanity.
So when you go out of your way to suggest that people should be thinking less — that not using one’s capacity for reason is an admirable position to take, and one that should be actively advocated — you are not saying anything particularly intelligent. And unless you live on a parallel version of Earth where too many people are thinking too deeply and critically about the world around them and what’s going on in their own heads, you’re not helping anything; on the contrary, you’re acting as an advocate for entropy.
And most annoyingly of all, you’re contributing to the fucking conversation yourselves when you make your stupid, stupid comments. You are basically saying, “I think people shouldn’t think so much and share their thoughts, that’s my thought that I have to share.” If you really think people should just enjoy the movie without thinking about it, then why the fuck did you (1) click on the post in the first place, and (2) bother to leave a comment? If it bugs you so much, GO WATCH A GODDAMN FUNNY CAT VIDEO.
I feel pretty sure Braak has written something like this at least once before, I should note. Anyway, the sentiment bears repeating.
Why do you have to think so hard about commenting? Why can’t you just enjoy it for what it is?
Mostly because I’m putting off work, is the honest answer.
I can’t believe you are so callously dismissing the obvious critique of modernity contained within videos of cats doing things that make people laugh.
@Tomás: No, I know. I owe all the funny cats out there who are trying to legitimatize the medium an apology.
[...] in reference to this, is delightful and gratifying, in no small part because it led to [...]
Of course you’re the one that ends up with a law named after him.
Damn it.
[...] Moff (called, by some, “Josh Wimmer,” as is the custom of his people), after an epic rant at some idiots on the internet, became the proud father of a New [...]
[...] had to post this amazing rant about the ridiculous “just enjoy the movie” comment you often see in movie discussions. [...]
[...] Racialicious, I was directed to this jeremiad, which wins the internet: Of all the varieties of irritating comment out there, the absolute most annoying has to be “Why [...]
Roger Ebert wrote in response to a poster who cited you: “Ebert: Moff’s Law. I’m going to be citing that.” You are (officially) a God of teh Internets. All Hail!
http://blogs.suntimes.com/ebert/2009/12/cameron_is-recrowned_king_of_the_world.html
Thats not the most annoying type of comment. The most annoying is someone breaking down a movie as if they were the only person to have seen it and that they have some godlike ability to discern its truths that are not available to others.
With this comes the devine directive to imform the masses that they didn’t actually see what they thought they saw but instead they saw what you are now about to inform them they saw and their disent is not welcome.
@Kristen: I hadn’t seen that. Thank you!
@Joe: Well, I think what you’re talking about is called film criticism, or reviewing. It’s been going on for a long time, and it’s pretty popular with a lot of people! That said, I don’t know of any serious critics who think they were the only person to have seen a movie, and who honestly believe that other people’s opinions about it don’t matter. Most of the critics I know of, in fact, welcome dissent. It gives them more to think and talk about.
[...] Racialicious, I was directed to this jeremiad, which wins the internet: Of all the varieties of irritating comment out there, the absolute most annoying has to be “Why [...]
Hahah. Two searches at TQP for, in quotes “Moff’s Law”. Hahahahahah.
@braak: Oh, those were probably me. [ASHAMED FACE]
[...] this comment about those who reply to criticism or analysis of entertainment with “it’s just a show [...]
[...] but not nearly as interesting or universal — of Godwin’s Law (or, more recently, Moff’s Law), there has got to be an informal adage out there dictating that the larger and more inviting the [...]